This is a copy of an email I sent out today to a mailing list. Hopefully, it wouldn't offend anyone anyway but I'm pretty sure that emails I write are my intellectual property. I'm almost certain that I'm on safe groud legally but, if anyone has a problem with it, I'll almost certainly delete the post.
Call me silly but I had an idea not too long ago and I decided to act on it today. While I don't have the resources to make donations to all or any of the causes out there that I find most worthwhile, I do have personal experiences. Not all of them are negative. The day when I bought my latest suit way back for my sister's wedding was a great day. Normally, I have very little patience for anything that might focus my attention on my body so trying on clothes tends to be something just short of hell.
Being fitted for a suit at the local "Mens Wearhouse" was a completely different experience. Melissa and I like to note that those of us who are out shape need not look terrible. One of the most important steps in looking good is finding clothes that you would want to wear that also fit you well. Both parts of this are equally important. Someone could probably make clothes to fit me by sewing together pieces of old fashioned potato sacks but I'd look terrible no matter how well it fit.
On that day, the sales associate and I had picked out my usual bland colored clothes that fit reasonably well. Just before she had started chalking them up for tailoring, I saw something that just caught my eye and mentioned it to Melissa. I'd always liked how pinstripe suits looked on other people but I assumed I'd look terrible in them. The associate heard me, disappeared and returned with a pinstripe suit in my approximate size. Over the next few minutes, I fell in love with a suit of clothes. Normally, I prefer male sales associates because there's no worrying about whether or not they think I look repulsive.
This woman associate made me feel utterly comfortable despite the fact that I had essentially undone her work. When I looked at myself in the mirror, I liked what I saw. More importantly, the carefully neutral look on the associate's face was replaced by a genuine looking smile of approval. My parents hate the way I dress 99% of the time. They were worried that I would show up to the wedding looking shabby because I look shabby almost all the time in their opinions. Thus, they contributed money toward the suit so that lack of money would not be the "excuse" that time.
I was worried that they would hate my pinstripe suit and want their money back. Instead, I felt a certain degree of approval from them. Maybe they just behave at weddings because they had been approving at my wedding too but I loved the suit and I still do.
To quote Bill Cosby, "I told you that story so I could tell you this one."
After reading and responding to Jodie's post about bravery, I decided to risk the pain and all involved in most efforts. After looking up contact information on their website, I decided to contact "Mens Wearhouse" and pitch them an idea. I felt foolish because I was talking to someone who was trained to handle customer complaints at a store level but their marketing department is inaccessible to calls or emails.
If I felt so good when I was able to get a suit of clothes that fit so well, how must it feel to have a severe injury or illness that alters your body more visibly than mine. What about all the amputees who have come back from military service, etcetera? What about breast cancer survivors or sufferers? Why not find a way to give these people some help adjusting to their new shapes? Why not help them feel good about themselves even for just a little while?
I hate talking on the phone especially to strangers and I'm already paying for the effort in pain. If I can throw an idea out there that might catch on, it sure would help reduce that shame even if just for a little while.
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